I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom, until they’re flashing behind you.3. Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.5. I’m great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.6. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.7. Take my advice - I’m not using it.8. My wife and I were happy for twenty years; then we met.9. Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they’re at home when you wish they were.10. Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.11. Ever stop to think and forget to start again?12. Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.13. He who laughs last thinks slowest.14. Is it wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly?15. Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys. It’s all prepaid as per his standard practice and the money is with a solicitor in Switzerland.”A Life HistorySitting down in the chair in the corner he waves for the others to sit down while saying, “Let me tell you a story about a man who’s a living zombie, a man who’s already died twice.” They stare at him. “The man I wish to tell you about lived a happy life with a wife and two lovely daughters. He was very rich from a large family trust that was well managed. He served in the Australian Army because he felt it was the right thing to do. One day his wife objected to his re-enlistment, something she agreed never to do before they got married. The same day he signed up for another five years she went to a lawyer for a divorce. She delayed the divorce and everything in the courts until he was posted overseas then she rushed everything through the courts in his absence. The judge handling the case was very biased and had no problem with doing things her way. However, it all came.
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